My Shocking 💰Discovery…That helped Darrin and me heal.
In case you missed it, I’ve been sharing Kate Northrup’s FREE Wide Receiver workshop. And it starts tomorrow – save your spot here! (Later in this blog, I'm going to break down exactly what you're going to get on each day of Wide Receiver, so keep reading!)
First, I want to tell you about a shocking discovery I made while diving into my inner work around money from doing one of Kate’s exercises… and how it helped me and Darrin heal a trouble spot in our relationship – finances.
Because with both love and money, it's really hard to shift anything on the outside until you've done some good, solid inner work.
It's like what I tell clients when they tell me they want to start our work together by fixing their dating profile. That's just a cosmetic change until we first heal what's on the inside – false beliefs and negative expectations about love. (No matter how good your dating profile looks, the inner stuff will always get in the way until it's cleared).
Same goes for money. If you’ve got old stories and baggage around it, no new budgeting apps or fancy financial plans will get you anywhere. Because first, there are patterns you need to shift.
Which brings me to what I discovered about my own baggage with money. My clue that something needed healing was how fraught my financial meetings with Darrin were.
Normally, our sacred partnership is super-harmonious and aligned. But our conversations around money were quite the opposite – tense.
Darrin and I had specific financial goals we were working towards. When we showed up each month for our household budget meeting and saw how far we were from meeting those goals, I would become uber-anxious and Darrin would get dark and shut down.
That would rattle my already-frazzled nervous system, and I would go into a tailspin trying to placate and reassure him.
Clearly, there was a lot at stake for healing what was going on between us. Not only did I want us to finally reach our financial goals, but the health of our partnership was also at stake. I needed to understand why my nervous system went into overdrive whenever we talked about money.
And what I discovered when I did one of Kate Northrup's “belief excavation” exercises literally Blew My Mind.
You see, my inner thermostat around money had been set to “financial struggle” at an early age. And even more troubling is that I had developed the belief that "financial struggle is what holds families together."
What??? Makes no logical sense, but our negative core beliefs rarely do.
When I was around 5, my dad left his full-time engineering job to start his own firm (very similar to me leaving my university job to start my own coaching practice, which I wrote about in a previous mailing). My Dad had only some evening business classes and some savings to get him through – and a ton of determination.
For a year, our family of 5 lived off of those savings while my dad tried to build his company from scratch. And let me tell you, the environment around money in our household was tense.
(Side note: I'm super-aware that what I experienced in a white middle-class family doesn’t compare to what families without our same level of privilege face. The heartbreaking truth is that they suffer WAY more than we did. I'm telling my story only to illustrate how the stressful environment impacted my inner world around money, and how that showed up in my partnership later on).
My Dad's role was to be the sole provider, but for a long time, his business didn’t bring anything in. His stress around money was hidden beneath the surface, but ready to burst out and explode at any moment – and it did, whenever I asked for anything I wanted.
My mom wore her money anxiety on her sleeve. She was in a constantly frazzled and “tight” place around money. She had a role with my dad – trying to placate him (and her own nervous system) by keeping our expenses low.
We kids had a role too – not to talk about what was going on. It was like the whole house was a powder keg that could explode at any moment if anyone said anything directly about our money worries.
Family dinners were tense, but as long as everyone played their roles, we were okay.
There was almost a solidarity to it, like “we’re all in this together.” Hence the belief that arose within me: “financial struggle holds families together.”
Here's the interesting thing: after a year or two, my dad's new engineering firm became really successful (it’s still around to this day, even though he retired. Entech Engineering in Reading, PA). We later moved to a nicer house and enjoyed some pretty awesome vacations (Hello, Disney!).
But the earlier era of financial struggle was what imprinted on my nervous system. That's what stayed with me. Even more potent is the fact that later on my parents’ marriage fell apart altogether and my dad moved out.
That's when my internal belief around money took on a Part 2: “if financial struggle holds families together, then maybe financial well-being is what drives them apart.”
That was my big “aha moment.” And that's what I had been playing out with Darrin. My inner child believed that if we actually became abundant, we might not survive. And so my nervous system did everything it could to keep me anxious, which also kept us in financial struggle.
Hopefully, now it’s clear to you why Kate Northrup puts such an emphasis on nervous system regulation around money. I'm telling you, this woman changed everything for me. Once I saw my old belief around money, I could heal it with her nervous system tools.
And then the outer financial steps started working better for us – like magic! Darrin and I now have a budgeting app that we love (shout out to Monarch!). And we've also been able to make strategic changes in our private practices to help us bring in more revenue. The end result is that we are now able to save money every month, rather than leaking it out.
The best part is that we are now operating like a well-oiled machine in the area of finances. For the first time, I feel like we are seeing each other as teammates for abundance, versus adversaries in financial struggle.
That's the beauty of sacred partnership – when both people hang in there and do the work, it's alchemic the results you can create.
But you gotta do your money work. And if you're single, you gotta do it now, if you want to set yourself up for smooth sailing with finances when you are in sacred partnership (if financial stability is one of the core values you’re seeking in a partner, double what I just said. You gotta be it in order to call it in).
And Kate Northrup is offering you the opportunity to do that deep money work on a silver platter – via her free Wide Receiver workshop (April 23-25).
Kate only offers these free money workshops once a year, so now is your moment, dear one! (Save your spot here).
But I don’t just want you to take it from me.
Here are some other (pretty fabulous) people who are singing Kate’s praises:
“I've never seen someone as clear, articulate, and downright MOTIVATING around showing women the path to financial freedom.” - Marie Forleo, Author of NY Times Bestseller Everything is Figureoutable & Creator of B-School
“10 years ago I took my first money course with Kate Northrup. From that experience I created millions and became ME. The course changed my life and how I receive and connect with money in my life.” - Allison Byrd, Money Mindset Strategist
“Kate totally transformed my beliefs around fear and money.” - Kris Carr, NY Times Bestselling Author of Crazy Sexy Kitchen
Kate may be a new name to you but she’s been helping ambitious people heal their relationships with money since 2012. 👀
In 2011, Kate paid off over $20k in debt in 6 months, tripled her income and doubled her savings.
And it wasn’t because she started a side hustle, stopped buying lattes, or followed some personal finance hack.
Kate followed a series of unconventional steps.
And these steps are exactly what she’s going to be walking you through in her free Wide Receiver workshop starting tomorrow.
Here’s what you’re going to get in each day:
☑️ Day One: The Surprising Key to Relaxed Money Manifestation
Unlock the secret to accessing the riches with your name on them by discovering the surprising key to Relaxed Money Manifestation during the first day of WIDE RECEIVER!
Learn why money mindset work and/or financial management work alone come up short when it comes to changing your financial reality, and what the missing ingredient is (SPOILER: it’s your nervous system)... *plus* high-yield tools you can use right away to begin reprogramming the cycle of money creation you’re in, by establishing belief and behavior change from the inside out.
If you’ve never tried updating your nervous system patterning around money, Day 1 will be game-changing for you..
Yes! I want to change my financial reality! >>
☑️ Day Two: Your Next Step to Financial Confidence, Clarity, and Magnetism
You know what’s incredibly attractive to money? Relaxation. But how can we get relaxed when money feels so stressful?
Day 2 will reveal a simple but powerful 6-step process to tap into an immediate state of relaxation and pleasure around money. The shift in yourself and energy will be felt instantly, and you’ll be open to new possibilities that result in aligned action steps to building wealth without stress.
Best of all, you’ll be able to take this process with you to continue turning stuckness into action and grow your money over your lifetime!
Heck yes! I wish I could feel relaxed about my money! >>
☑️ Day Three: Bridging The Gap Between Experiencing & Creating Real Wealth with The Relaxed Money Blueprint
There are 13 principles of making, keeping, growing, and giving relaxed money (these principles have been tried and tested by thousands of Kate’s students, and in WIDE RECEIVER, she’s sharing them with you).
Most financial experts either teach you about saving, money making strategies and wealth building tactics, or they teach you about mindset and spiritual abundance. Day 3 bridges the gap so you can use these principles to call in abundance while being a powerful force for good in the world in a feel-good way.
Finally, you’ll understand how money works on emotional, nervous system, real world *and* quantum level, remember your power as a leading player in the cycle, and be ready to receive the bounty with your name on it.
This event has now finished. Thank you to anyone in my community for attending and participating.
Or, if you've ever found parallels between your love stories and your money stories, we'd love to hear from you by posting a comment below.
Christina McMahon is a love coach and certified somatic counselor. Over the past seven years, she has helped hundreds of conscious singles remove inner barriers to love and step into the love life they desire and deserve.
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